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How Do You Rewire Your Love Blueprint if it Always Leads You Into the Wrong Relationships

What does a mature and healthy relationship look like?

A mature and healthy relationship is when you’re an individual making choices about how you want to be treated and how you want to treat others, independent of the modeling or blueprint that you were given by your family of origin on how to “do” love.

In fact, if you’re still doing relationships according to your family of origin’s blueprint, which for many of us was dysfunctional, you’re not ready for a mature and healthy relationship.

You need to be creating the relationship on your terms and not as a copy of how someone else (like your parents) did it. It’s surprising that I even have to write this but this is so common that it requires to be acknowledged.

How do you rewire your love blueprint if the one you got from your family of origin has you earning love, performing and sacrificing?

I know that it’s not a popular idea – but dating.

Dating with NEW skills is how you rewire the blueprint.

Because you need to get into relationships where there will be healthy energy flow.

You need the awareness of the blueprint, that’s the mental level.

Then your inner child needs healing but this is not a daunting task, it’s just a process of honoring her reality, really allowing you to see very clearly what she went without as a result and giving yourself a chance to grieve.

Just to drive this home, you can’t go from an unhealthy love blueprint to a healthy relationship just because you’re suddenly aware of it.

That’s like going from lifting 100 lbs in the gym to lifting 300 lbs without training. You can train, get emotionally strong and learn self-honoring and get there, but it’s not overnight.

You have to PRACTISE.

Your inner child needs to be held and witnessed in what she went through and this honestly can be done in just 1-3 sessions. This is something you can do with a coach or therapist and I help you do this in my 90 day 1-1 intensive.

You need to forgive yourself for continuing the cycle now that you see it. This is important so that you don’t continue operating from guilt because you haven’t forgiven yourself, which then propagates the cycle of self-sacrifice and earning love because you don’t believe you deserve love. We can do this in 1-2 sessions in my 90 day 1-1 intensive.

You need to release any worries or fears that’s it’s not possible to exist in a relationship in a different, non-draining and non-self-sacrificaial configuration. Your body-mind soul organism needs to EXPERIENCE what that feels like and have the opportunity to RUN energy in a different configuration IN YOUR BODY.

We create the opportunity for you to run your energy in a new configuration through dating healthy masculine men who want to provide and support you in your power. Then we come back together to assess, heal and release anything showing up in the way of your ability to RECEIVE in our 1-1 sessions.

This may be 1 or several sessions depending on your personal thought patterns and habits. This is something we do in my 90 day intensive using Sedona method.

Sedona method, integrated with the healing and awareness here will take a belief such as, “it’s not possible to have everything I need in love” feeling like a “10/10” in truth, validity and relevance to you personally to it feeling like 0/10 in relevance, truth and validity to you. You will feel that it’s something you have a choice to engage in and in that awareness, you will most likely choose release it. We can do this in just 1 session.

In some cases, the belief can’t go to a 0 because there’s other layers. For example, there is a benefit to holding that belief and acting accordingly. Let’s say your mother and sisters never manifested that kind of love. And you would be the odd one out in the family. You know deep down that would stir up some issues with your family of origin, AKA, tribe. So the “benefit” of keeping that belief is belonging.

Then you can make a choice with your human spirit to engage in relationships with other women who live in that frequency. And you may choose to accept that you won’t belong to that tribe in the same way anymore if you embody a new possibility.

What I see over and over again is that the women who make these choices are ecstatic and feel it’s absolutely WORTH it. And sometimes by shifting the possibilities in our own life, we become the new way holder for others in our lineage.

I know that’s you if you’re reading this because this is what Feminine leaders DO.

I want to spell it out very clearly for anyone who may be encountering these ideas for the first time.

These are the stages:

1. Awareness intellectually – this post and yesterday’s post

2. Forgiveness of self for re-creating the cycle – this is moving energy IN your body to resolve this

3. Compassion and healing of where the cycle originated and how it impacted you as a child and grieving what you needed but went without as a result – this moves this energy through your body to create space for new possibilities and new creations

4. Release of any worries or fears that this is permanent or it’s going to keep you from creating a healthy relationship

5. Giving yourself the opportunity to choose new behaviors through dating

Addressing these stages while incorporating the practice of intentional dating is the reason why my 90 day “Meet Your Dream Man” 1-1 Intensive is so effective.

We’re healing and resolving the old dysfunctional patterns at the root while simultaneously growing new patterns in the process of dating.

New patterns create NEW results.

Results like healthy, hot, nourishing love. Want? 🙂

That’s how my clients meet their match within the frame of the 90 day container and in an average of 5 -10 dates using my dating method.

This combination is so powerful and potent that then these women go on to get engaged to their dream man in just 12 months.

If you’re ready to break generational cycles of settling, sacrificing, playing small, feeling unsupported, unmet and unseen in love, then I am here for you and for your vision!

I help you do this in my 90 day 1-1 intensive and I have 1 spot open left for April, is it yours?

Send me a DM, let’s connect and see if we’re a fit to walk this incredible journey together.

I will ask you a few questions over messenger to see if we’re soulmates for this work and if so, we can get started right away.

Love, Emilia

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