Want to know how not to waste your energy and time on draining text messages and calls that go nowhere with the men you’re dating? I am spelling it out here.
Navigating Online Dating: The Art of Allowing Him to Lead
Again I want to remind you that this is the EXACT process my clients use every week to meet amazing, conscious, masculine men; men they go exclusive with, get engaged to in apx 12 months, then about 1-2 yrs after engagement, marry. It’s how I met my amazing husband.
SECRET 4: ALLOW HIM TO LEAD
A healthy, available and sincere man who is serious about finding a mate will work to find out what you are about.
He may send a note asking you what you would like to do.
Be forthcoming with information about places you like, i.e. Balboa Park, Little Italy, The Harbor, etc. Be genuine about what you like and want.
He just wants to make you happy.
As soon as your third reply, provide a phone number.
This is where the rubber meets the road in whether he is really ready to show up.
Now you may look through his profile to learn something very specific about him.
He may have said he likes fishing. So your reply in response to his asking what you like to do could read, “Hi Mark thanks for your e-mail. I like to walk on the beach in my spare time. It seems like we have something in common since you like fishing and I like to eat fish. I look forward to speaking with you. Ana. 657-567-4565.”
It is important to send an e-mail connecting to him this way because otherwise he may wonder why you are providing a number he didn’t ask for.
But you don’t want an online relationship, right?
You’re not looking for a pen-pal, right?
You want to meet.
You’re using the internet for introductions.
Not for relationships.
Phone Call Etiquette: A Crucial Step in Decoding His Intentions
So give him the number and a good reason for why you are doing so and wait for his next move.
Do not have more than a 5-10 minute conversation over the phone. This is something A LOT of women struggle to do. As I said in the last post, if he’s a healthy masculine man he will see this brief phone call as an opportunity to ask you out.
How to conduct the phone call: Answer his call with a smile on your face because men can hear and sense a smile.
Try your best to be friendly and express appreciation for his call.
When you answer the phone, you can say, “Hi this is Ana” or if you already know his name because he texted first you can say, “Hi Mark I’m so happy you called thanks for being the brave one to call a stranger!” Because he did.
Then let him take the lead. It might feel awkward not to jump in and save him but please don’t do it.
Don’t interrogate him, but if he asks you questions answer them and at the end add, “And you?”
When 5 mins have passed, start thinking about how you’re going to get off the phone.
You don’t HAVE to get off the phone if you’re loving the convo; stay on.
I am only telling you this because you can’t possibly talk to COPNNECT (yet) to the amount of men I want you getting calls from. Leave the connecting for the introduction in person date.
When the 5-10 min mark comes, say, “Mark thank you so much for calling. It was great to talk to you. I was getting ready to meet a friend energy or I was getting ready to call my mom…” or whatever you were ACTUALLY doing because we women are always doing a MILLION things at once, right?
It’s Ok to tell him what you were doing and that you’d like to get back to it so you can finish it before it gets too late.
Then just leave a pause. Breathe and let him respond.
He might respond with…
Can I call you again OR Do you want to meet?
The answer is YES I would love to!
And then take it from there.
Beyond Texts: Infusing Positive Energy into Meaningful Connections in Dating
If you follow what I taught you so far, you’re going to go out with healthy masculine men only and NOT with losers, married men, effeminate men and narcissists.
There are 5 more secrets for a total of 9 and I will be posting one a day over the next weeks.
And if you’re single and you want my expert help meeting your match, hand-holding, tissues when you cry and lots of love and care to help you attract a ton of high quality masculine men so you can pick your energy, then I invite you to consider joining my Soulmate Attraction Formula 10 Week Group energy Program starting on March 30th at 10 am PST on zoom. You get 5 group and 5 private calls with me.
This is a LIVE group program I am offering starting March 30th for a max of 10 women who want to learn how to date in a way that nurturing, fun and easy while at the same time selecting effortlessly for high quality masculine men who are ready for a committed relationship.
My clients meet their dream match in 3-6 months at a rate of 1-2 dates a week, using this EXACT strategy but often within the first 5-10 introductions.
This program has a deep healing or component to help you resolve any past wounds and unhealthy behaviors so that you can create a healthy relationship.
This is a practical ON the ground coaching and mentorship program that gives you proven tools on how to date using the least amount of energy but getting the most results; results being enjoyable, easy dates with high quality masculine men.
If you’re interested in this program, just send me a DM and we will have a quick chat over messenger to make sure it’s a fit and if so, we can get started right away.