The success of your relationship depends on YOU, dear divine feminine woman, not HIM.
I know it may SEEM like it depends on someone OUTSIDE of you because their decisions, their opinions, their desires and their willingness and commitment could either MAKE or BREAK the whole thing, RIGHT?
Like it feels like…
If he doesn’t want to see me then I don’t have any control over that…
If he doesn’t want a long term relationship with me then I don’t’ have any control over that…
If he doesn’t want to communicate with me, then I don’t have any control over that…
But what if I told you that YES actually you DO have a LOT more control than you think.
Now let me me VERY clear.
I am NOT talking about a relationship racing and competing for who is control, where there is co-dependency.
Where one partner thinks that the outcome of that relationship depends on the other person entirely.
NO.
A HEALTHY Relationship is a CO-Creation.
And in so being, it is INTER-Dependent.
NOT Co-Dependent and NOT IN-Dependent.
INTER-Dependent.
Independent would mean that there is NO relationship.
Co-Dependent would mean that the relationship depends on ONE person ALL or MORE than the other person.
And what I am saying is that because a healthy relationship is a CO-Creation it is INTERdependent.
That means you have your PART in the PARTnership.
SO if you have your PART, then it doesn’t depend on someone outside of you.
It’s like saying that the success of a play that you’re starring in depends on the OTHER actors but not you.
But you’re IN that play and if you don’t show up for the rehearsals you will mess up your part and that will affect the other actors and the overall success of the play. Right?
And if you’re IN that play and you don’t show up for the performance, will the play be a SUCCESS?
NO.
So you have your PART to play and in so being, the relationship does absolutely a 1000% DEPEND on you.
Yes, the relationship DEPENDS on YOU.
That is all general relationship stuff here that might seem SO obvious but you’d be surprised how many women I talk to that give away their POWER and their PART in the PARTNERSHIP with men and think that it’s somehow the man that has a say in where the relationship goes and what happens in it or if it has a future.
And I know it might seem that that’s what I am saying when I say “a healthy masculine man leads.”
I know it might be like, well you said he is the leader so doesn’t that mean that YES OBVOUSLY it depends on him?
And the answer is nooooooooooooo!
For two very important reasons in addition to your PART that I described above.
The reasons are this:
1. Healthy masculine men RESPOND to femininity/women
2. Healthy masculine men LEAD but they lead with what you want and need front and center because of #1
That’s why I always say, be a PARTner and not a PICKLE.
A Pickle is NOT what healthy masculine men want.
Imagine a couple dancing….
If you’ve ever tried any kind of partner dance like salsa or bachata or waltz or tango you will KNOW exactly what I am saying here.
The man LEADS in the dance but the woman has a PART in following, giving pressure, moving in sync, moving her weight, letting him move her weight or help her move her weight, etc…
If he’s leading and you’re just standing there and you don’t give pressure back on his hand, he can’t lead.
If he’s leading and you’re just being dragged around LOL the floor without being present and without RESPONDING, there’s no partnership.
It’s not a dance then.
It’s a flop, right?
If he’s leading and you keep stepping away and don’t meet him, balance with him, step in rhythm with him and share your physical weight with him, there IS no dance.
Can you SEE it?
It’s the EXACT same thing in a relationship.
If you’re not THERE and in your POWER, there IS no relationship.
So how can we say the relationship doesn’t depend on you?
It would not be accurate.
Or helpful.
Or within the realm of where humanity is going with marriages – sacred unions!
Having said ALL of that, my point is this: It doesn’t depend on him.
It depends on YOU.
On how you show up.
On what you ask for.
On what you express.
On what you receive.
On what you embody.
On how you communicate.
On what you believe.
On IF you’re even THERE.
Like really PRESENT.
You might be there, living in the same house, but you’re not really there.
Or there might be wounds that keep you from being there out of fear, so you only energetically pop in occasionally, but you’re not really THERE.
Or there might be beliefs about men and/OR partnership such as the one I am describing here that actually STOP you alltogether from being present because you think your part is to hand over your power.
Maybe because that’s what was modeled to you.
Maybe that’s what you see in the couples around you; either she hands over her power or he does.
Maybe that’s your interpretation of relationships from childhood and you just haven’t upgraded it yet.
So that’s when you would want someone like me in your corner.
To guide you into true sacred union with your divine masculine counterpart where the partners only surrender to the synergy of the union!
So that you can create your relationship, not just be a bystander in it.
And if you know what I mean and you’re ready to go there then I invite you to send me a DM and ask about my 90 day 1-1 intensive. When you message me I will respond back with a few questions to see if we’re a fit and if so, we can get started right away.
In that intensive we work on ALL of the things I described above in a proven method of strategic and easeful dating, powerful partnering and love longevity.
My clients meet their match in just 5-10 dates and many are already married, living together, having children, raising children, going on world travel adventures, creating businesses, loving, laughing and dancing through life.
You can too!
Love Emilia