Shaky feminine/masculine energetics is the reason that your relationships don’t work out once you meet a man you like and things seem to be going somewhere positive.
If you (the feminine woman) are not intentionally – or even absentmindedly because you’re multiple dating, lol – holding a vulnerable and receptive space for him to enter on his own timing, and of his own volition, he doesn’t have anywhere to land as a masculine.
To put it plainly, there’s nowhere to put it.
Form follows function.
Masculine men’s energetic function is generative and penetrative and hence they also have that form. Feminine women’s energetic function is the receptive and creative and hence they have the form for that.
So let’s say he’s texted you a few times and said things like, you know you can call me if you ever wanna talk or, I wanna catch up when you’re free or Holla at me……
and instead of saying,
“hey hi, holla, I am free to chat today at (the time that you’re free and feeling gorgeous lol :)”
you say,
“Hey holla, I can call you this afternoon, if you’re going to be free and have service.”
YIKES!!!!!
Understanding Energetics in Relationships: Beyond the Rules
You just made him the feminine! He doesn’t want to recieve FROM you – in this case, a call. He wants to give TO you – his time and energy.
I know I know it’s crazy that I am taking THIS much time and THIS many words to explain this very subtle difference but remember, WORDS have ENERGY. We want to house and hold the space for certain energy by who we’re being and what we’re saying.
We are talking about ENERGETICS here, not rules. Once the energy is flowing safely and securely between a couple, it creates momentum and a fortress that can’t be messed with, it’s unshakable.
That’s why it’s SO worth cultivating the energetics of sacred union and you see me go on and FN on but this is how you AVOID divorce, a broken home and a broken heart!
The Importance of Vulnerability: Parking in the Right Spot
By making yourself the one to call IF he has service and IF he is free, it’s basically putting yourself in the blue parking spot and parking there in your car.
The only other spot that remains available and open to park next to you is the PINK spot and if he’s a masculine man, he doesn’t want to park there.
So he responds, “I have an appointment that should be over by 4. Are you still with family for holidays?
And that response feels kind of off. Wait, weren’t we trying to connect on a call? Huh?? Why can’t he say Ok I will call after my dr appointment around 4?
Because you made him the woman, that’s why. And you’re unknowingly and unintentionally giving him mixed signals Energetics.
The two vulnerable responses that would park you in the pink spot and let him pull alongside in the blue spot so you guys can have SACRED partnership ENERGY flow are the EXACT two you avoided because they were too vulnerable.
And so you gave him nowhere to land.
He dodges and you feel insecure and played. I am sorry.. You didn’t do anything wrong, but you had something to do with it – you just didn’t know. Or if you’re here reading my posts you DO know and you might be sending me a DM shortly. (I will respond with a few questions to see if we’re a fit to work together and if so, we can get started right away and you can get engaged by the end of 2024 to the man of your dreams).
And I have seen this scenario 100s of times. Women in high up successful positions that require them to use their masculine energy have this problem a LOT, so you’re not a lone.
Because your two responses that would have carried vulnerable energy would have been:
- “I can talk at……. and looking forward to speaking with you then 😊.” And then let him DO the thing and call when you’ve given him the quality information he needs – like he knows he will get you and he won’t bother you.
- “Can I call you at 5 when the family’s doing their thing and I’ll be alone?” Might sound generative because you’d be the one calling but in this case you’re ASKING PERMISSION and he agrees to PROVIDE the time that works for you – so the overall energetics put him in the generative, providing role.
If you don’t respond in one of these 2 energetic ways, you’re basically giving him these options: submit, resist, or flee.
He doesn’t have the choice to provide for you, which is what a masculine man wants to DO.
Creating an Unbreakable Bond: The Love River vs. The Puddle
Once the energetics work and are flowing from masculine to feminine and back to masculine, where the masculine knows he will be received and appreciated and the feminine knows she will be safe and supported (in other words, both partners are feeling SAFE being their core polarity energy and not attacked the way the mainstream teaches us to attack these sacred energies), the bond is UNBREAKABLE.
It takes a LOT to destroy/shake this kind of bond, because it’s like a wide river flowing. So much energy. So much power. Can you stop a strong river? Not so easy.
Can you mess with a puddle that’s blown here and there by the wind? VERY easy.
Do your part to create a LOVE RIVER and not a puddle with your masculine man, lol.
This is EAXCLTY what I help you create in my 1-1 private intensive; either in the relationship you’re currently in with the man you’re dating or if you know you tend to regularly create these kinds of dynamics in your dating life and therefore end up with the wrong men. Sorry at this time I am not accepting established couples into my coaching practice.
If you’re a feminine woman but you just don’t know what to do in the early tender dating stages with a masculine man, then, yes, you COULD mess it up and yes, this IS what I help with, so send me a DM if you want help.