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What Do You Do When Dating is Just Too Dull

If you’re dating and your dates are consistently dull, it’s because you’re not FEELING enough…’re too guarded and just not being vulnerable enough for it to be fun.

Sure, some men are dull. But if you’re on dates reciting an “about me” section by rote, you WILL be bored.

If you’re selecting for healthy masculine men online or offline the way I teach you FREE here AND you’re showing up willing to be vulnerable with SAFE men, then your dates are going to be anything but dull.

It might not be a match. That’s normal. We don’t need fireworks, that’s usually NOT a sign of a healthy connection anyway.

But it’s still not going to be dull.

And it especially won’t be dull once you start practicing the energetics of feminine masculine energy flow/polarity because THAT is electrifying, even if it’s NOT your guy.

You have to risk a little for some excitement, LOL.

Energetically speaking, that looks like letting the man in, just a LITTLE bit. Opening your soft feminine heart, letting him see your FEELINGS, not your THOUGHTS.

This is SOOOO hard for almost every woman I work with because modern day corporate culture has us all turned into THINKING masculine beings focused on HOW to produce results.

But our thoughts are NOT the thing that will give you what you need to know about a man or create any kind of meaningful connection for you if you’re a feminine woman, at all. And sharing your THOUGHTS with him without also sharing your feelings, will ALWAYS feel dull AF.

What won’t feel dull is if you dare to share how you’re FEELING.

You need to FEEL in order to do this. I know, scary.
That’s why in my How to Pick the RIGHT Guy checklist I give away FREE at, one of the important steps I tell you is to give yourself time to turn into a girl about an hour before a date.

HOW to turn back into a girl from your most likely masculine energy dominated workplace experience is in the checklist you can get free here:

I am asking you to do this so that you will be connected to your FEELINGS when you go on your date, your FEMINIE side.

If you’re NOT connected to your feelings, ALL the dates will be dull. So you have to risk a little. You can’t be too hard. Hard = Dull.

But I am not asking you to risk a lot.

Like you do NOT have to risk your physical safety.

You cannot possibly risk your emotional safety no matter what feelings you tell a stranger, because let’s face it, it’s a stranger. LOL.

So if you’re dating, especially if you’re using my formula to select high quality masculine men – feeling that the dates are dull means you’re being too guarded.

This post isn’t to tell you that you should not be guarded.

Or that you’re wrong for being guarded.

Dating is hard. You’ve probably had some awful experiences over the years that MADE you guarded.

Dating is hard……

You’re basically meeting men you don’t know. Strangers.

And if you’re not feeling emotionally safe with yourself, capable of being powerful instead of being pleasing and polite, and comfortable with the ins and outs of a dating strategy….

Dating is going to be HARD. Excruciating, even.

You’re not alone in this.

Many women feel this.

Many women struggle.

That is why I do this work.

One of the many reasons.

And I know it must be so confusing when I am telling you to be powerful AND vulnerable.

WTF Emilia are you really a relationship coach LOL?

YES. You CAN be both powerful, safe AND vulnerable.

It means knowing how to listen to yourself.

It means knowing that when you know what you need, you tell yourself and those around you, if needed.

This is actually a superpower when it comes to having a thriving and lasting romantic relationship with a healthy masculine man and it’s one of the BIG pieces we learn to practice and embody in my 90 day 1-1 Meet Your Dream Man Intensive.

And we practice this HOW?


But not dating the way you’re most likely currently doing it or what you’re thinking about when you hear the word “dating.”

Dating my way means you don’t betray yourself so you’re always safe. That’s powerful.

It’s not an outward powerful, not in the way we think of as power in our modern age.

It’s an inward powerful, as in you’re safe because you TRUST yourself to stay connected to yourself and your needs moment to moment.

You TRUST yourself to take care of yourself.

This is a hard one and is one of the main reasons women find dating SO HARD….and dull comes along with that too.

And it’s also the reason why women show up to dates guarded.

Listen, men are not going to hurt you.

You have everything you need to be safe.

If you follow my dating strategy you’ll be meeting healthy masculine SAFE men.

If you meet them in a public place and don’t accept rides for the first multiple dates then you’re physically SAFE.

Most women don’t feel physically in danger when dating, or at least there are plenty of precautions that can be taken to assure your physical safety.

Most women fear for their EMOTIONAL safety.

Then you don’t share anything of significance and vulnerability on your dates and then OFCOURSE they are dull.

But listen, men don’t have power over you.

Most men you will meet dating – and ESPECIALLY if you’re using my dating strategy – are going to be good men that are not dating experts LOL, just looking for a relationship.

The reason dating is hard and dull is because you’re not really THERE when you’re so guarded.

I can help you with this! This is exactly the kind of problem we solve in my 90 day intensive.

Dates go from dull to fun, boring to nourishing, wanting to just hit your head against the table from boredom LOL to having hope that OMG can this thing actually WORK for me?

YES it can.

I invite you to send me a DM if this is happening for you! I will respond with a few questions over messenger to see if it’s the right fit and if so, we can get started right away.

Love, Emilia

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